So what now and how do we handle all the doubts and keep secret from the doubters.

I struggle with myself. I know that I might be better off working fifty hours a week.if I'm at work, I might get exhausted but least I won't be sitting around my room drinking Iced coffees. 

I just think staying at work will keep me even keel and sober. 

I struggle with substance abuse. 

And sometimes I think I should call the cops and go back to mental health in a locked facility and talk about what I'm going through and see what they have to say. 

But you know me. 

I think things wear off but we still deal with how we think and feel and struggle to stay on top of our game.

I don't know but with me..... 

Yeah drugs are bad but if you have the money to buy them then what? Save your cash?

Also their is this.....

We have to do something we're passionate about. 

And we have to make money anyways unless I just go to the cops and say hey I don't want to live this life anymore what can I do?

Yeah I like hanging out with my friends and no I don't like how I feel after a night of partying.

It's just sucks. 

It sucks being sober and drugs suck.

So what can we do?

Make music?

Read the Bible all day hoping God shows us a way through.

Maybe those are good ideas. 

But the doubt inside doesn't always cause me to have more doubters it's that I'm not performing well and that's not OK. 

So what though you might say. 

Well...... 

I don't know. 

But what I do know is this. 

Make good decisions if you want to. 

Think ahead if you want to... 

Or just find a purpose in this life. 

I got mine and it happened put of nowhere. 

I knew that buidling a multi planet habitat and going to build and design in space is what I think we should do.

Were dinasaurs. 

We might go extinct.... 

I know that might sound funny but I'm not going out no more really. 

I think what and how should I solve this dilemma?

I know that I will have to conquer a planet.

Can we be more than conquerers?

We have to be.

No time in history have we been this advanced. We have to take notice of dinasaur bones and where or what was here before us. 

So let's dabble a little bit more into in the next post.