Right now I am watching I Survived on AE. It's an OK show there are some really cruel people out there as my grandma would say.
Lately Ive been having crazy dreams where I am always missing class in college. I feel terrible about it. I guess it was something important. I wish I wouldn't have missed so many classes in real life and I can't believe I did that. It costed money and now I am in debt. I was to busy partying and not doing what I should have been doing was going to class.
Right now I am doing research on how to make money blogging. I have a book started and it wants me to make a review site and talk about different products. It says I can make twenty five hundred a month if I do this and I will make the money within ninety days. I don't know if that's true but I don't want to make a review site, I just want to grow my blog.
It's starting to warm up here in Minnesota and I'd like to get back in shape and start running and playing basketball. There are not that many kids my age here but I did see some younger girls with there kids. I should have said hi but I didnt. I need to lose some weight, around fifty pounds. I eat three meals a day, usually Fruity Pebbles and or Cherios for breakfast and then some sort of hot meal for lunch and dinner. I eat pretty good here and I can't complain.
I noticed online a few friends from high school passed away. I miss them. One girl named Heather I was hanging out with just before she passed away. I don't know what happened to her. I mean I was just with her and then I noticed someone on Facebook saying she had died and he went to her funeral. Another kid who I found out had died was living in Colorado just down the street. I don't know what happened to him either. I wish I could find out how they died. Maybe I could call the hospital but I doubt that will work.
I still can't believe I stole a car and got stuck in Minnesota. I guess you live and you learn. Right now I'm watching Court Cam and I guess I'm lucky I didn't get in that much trouble. I need money and can't move back into my mom or dad's house. I hate asking them for money, they work so hard for their money it's not even funny. I know I need to make it on my own and I know blogging is my way out to financial freedom. Some of the guys I stay with have no way out of their situation, there to old and don't have computers. I think they know they are going to die at this Board N Lodge. They still talk about moving out though. It's a sad situation at best. Most of the guys smoke here and they smoke a pack a day. I started smoking and it's like a dream killer. I notice that I don't get the insight I usually get one I'm clean and sober. I like to drink soda and I have been splitting a twelve pack with one of them so I have soda everyday. A twelve pack of Shasta is 4.66$. So it's usually about $2.50 a price between the two of us.
I also have a cup of coffee and a ciggerette every morning than I just lay around and watch TV or get on Facebook. The mornings are rough and I don't feel that good. I usually wake up or get going around one thirty in the afternoon. Then I start moving. I just talk to my doctor this morning and he put me on Paxil. Hopefully it helps with my depression. I really just get down and deppressed sometimes and I'm also really tired. Soda used to pick me up but I don't get the same high cuz I drink it everyday.
I really want to go sober and see where my life takes me. I know that it is the best way forward. I don't want to go back to jail and I have not had anymore police interactions for a while. I think I'm all cleared up with all my legal issues. I hate jail right now with Covid 19 going on because I had to stay in my cell for twenty three and a half hours per day. We couldn't leave the cell and had sit there all day. My cell mate all he wanted to do is sleep and I couldn't take sleeping all day. I needed the light on so I could read but I didn't say anything about it and didn't make it an issue. It sucks not having any money in jail. I like to drink there instant coffee and rap for a while to see how good I can get. It's all there is to do in there. I hate hot meals they serve in jail they always give me gas. When I got out of jail the first night I got out I couldn't sleep and ended up staying up all night. Then I ended up sleeping all day. It felt good to be out of there though and I can't complain.
I notice alot of the blog I have been reading have recommended that I sell online courses but I don't know how to do that. I don't want to do it really at all. They also recommend getting sponsered posts but I don't think I want to do that. I think I will just stick to recommending affiliate products from Amazon.com. They have plenty of products to talk about.
Will go for now.....
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